Beau Gannon's Gossip Girl Recap - Episode One

Good people of the internet, I am asking you, to follow me, a 32 year old man, as I embark on a journey through one of television's most decorated, respected, poignant examples of a late 2000's teen drama...Gossip Girl. 

I have never watched Gossip Girl before this, and I know nothing about the show. Found out yesterday that Blake Lively, Tony Romo's brother-in-law, Cindy Lou Who, John Tucker's brother, and the girl from a Netflix movie (The Weekend Away...bad movie) are all in this show. 

My initial reaction? I'm going to love it. Is it good? Verdict is still out on that...but regardless I am going to love it. 

Here is my reaction to episode one: 

I am team S. S is Serena, but Gossip Girl calls her S, and I want to remain canon. Serena and Blair (Weekend Away girl) were longtime friends but S slept with B's boyfriend (Tony Romo's brother-in-law) and we discovered this information because Chuck Bass (we'll get into him in a moment), saw them going at it during a wedding. I know it seems like a scumbag move to sleep with your best friend's boyfriend, and I am not going to defend those actions, but S went away to boarding school for upwards of 10 months, and it seems like she has really changed. She went on a nice date with the handsome high school outcast, John Tucker's brother, and she visits her suicidal? (am I understanding that correctly?) brother in his rehab facility. Overall S seems nice, she also told Cindy Lou Who that she liked her Kissing Party dress and it would look even better in black.

Chuck Bass...this dude... I've never been more conflicted on a character in the first episode of a show. Chuck is your stereotypical high school douche, who refers to himself in the third person, smokes more pot than Willie Nelson, and does what every normal high school kid does, has threesomes with waitresses. I know what you're thinking "this dude rocks"...but unfortunately Chuck not only assaulted S, but he also assaulted Cindy Lou Who. Dude was the biggest wild card in the first episode, and I feel like the problematic behavior isn't going to slow down from here. 

Lastly, I am going to make a prediction that I think Jenny, aka Cindy Lou Who, is Gossip Girl. I mean I did figure out that Kristen Bell is technically Gossip Girl, but only as the narrator. My prediction for now is that it's Jenny, but I will update this prediction throughout the series. I landed on Jenny because she is the person I most medium suspect. S is the character that I most suspect, because it felt like the narration was coming from her voice, and Captain Howard Archibald (what a name) is the character I least suspect...although I had to look up his name just now and finding out this is it...suddenly, based on that name, he is creeping up my suspect board.